Loneliness isn’t your destiny—God designed you for deep, meaningful friendships that can transform your life.
Discover how to reclaim your God-given design for community and experience the joy of being fully known and loved.
Jake Thurston combines biblical truths and psychological insights to help readers remedy loneliness and build faith-centered, life-changing friendships.
In this book, you will learn to:
REMEDY loneliness through the ancient Christian practice of spiritual friendship.
ENGAGE more deeply with your local church and community.
BUILD stronger friendships through the power of vulnerability.
EXPERIENCE the freedom of being fully known and understood.
LIVE a more fulfilling, God-centered life through meaningful connections.
You Need Friends provides faith-driven strategies to transform isolation into authentic community. This book equips readers to build deep relationships that empower them to thrive spiritually and emotionally.
It’s time to reclaim your God-given design for community. Start your journey to deeper connection with You Need Friends today!
Praise for You Need Friends
“This book beats the drum that we need to hear: God made us for friendship. In our modern moment, there may be no more important message.”
Justin Whitmel Earley
Business Lawyer and Author of Made for People,
Habits of the Household, and The Common Rule
“In an age of isolation and loneliness, this simple read points us to the ancient practice of spiritual friendship in a format that works for this generation. Birthed out of the intersection of deep study, a local faith community, and personal experience, Thurston provides a hopeful path forward for the lonely, longing heart.”
Dr. Andrea Summers
Campus Pastor and Dean of Spiritual Formation of Indiana Wesleyan University
“This work by Jake Thurston proclaims one of the most important truths related to human flourishing: you need friends! Friendship with God, self, and others is what you will be reminded of and challenged with in this thorough discourse. In fact, while reading it, I was reminded of the most used two-word phrase in all the Bible related to human existence: ‘one another.’ Beyond the fact that these two words appear in Scripture around eighty times, we were made by a triune God who lives and leads in relationship. You and I are created for relationship. This is one area in which Christ followers and the church of Jesus should excel—providing the opportunity to offer genuine friendship with God as well as with others.”
Dr. Jim Dunn
President of Oklahoma Wesleyan University
“You could wade through countless studies that trace how relational behavior has evolved through developments in architecture, sociology, commerce, and technology. You could gain a comprehensive picture of the neuroscience behind loneliness and the research that reveals the negative implications of loneliness on human biology. Or . . . you could read Jake’s book that describes all this in a friendly, conversational way. And that’s just part one! Jake doesn’t leave us hanging. He has also done research into the theology of relational connection, and we now receive the benefit. He lays out a simple pathway that is the culmination of the multidisciplinary approach to address loneliness. Best of all, the action steps are natural, easy, and comfortable. Give your body, mind, and soul the gift of You Need Friends.”
Dr. Dave Bushnell
Founder of Mobilize Leadership
“You Need Friends is a timely and heartfelt invitation to rediscover the spiritual richness of life lived in authentic relationships. In a world increasingly marked by isolation, this book reminds us God designed us for connection and community. Through biblical insights, real-life stories, and practical steps, Dr. Jake Thurston beautifully illuminates how friendships are not just optional but essential to our spiritual and emotional well-being. You Need Friends is a road map for cultivating relationships that honor God and bring healing to the soul. If you’ve ever struggled with loneliness or felt disconnected from God, this book will inspire you to embrace the abundant, friend-filled life God intends for you. I wholeheartedly recommend it to anyone longing to deepen their relationships and live more fully in God’s plan for community.”
Dr. Ed Love
Executive Director of Church Multiplication and Discipleship for The Wesleyan Church
“As soon as I wasn’t surrounded by school classrooms and activities, finding ‘my people’ became more difficult. My desire for friendships didn’t change, but they didn’t come about as conveniently as the playground days. Jake’s book, You Need Friends, is the book your soul knows you need. I highly recommend it—may it be the catalyst for you to defeat loneliness and build life-giving community.”
David Kinnan
Lead Pastor of Fountain Springs Church
“Ever since I first met Jake, it was clear that he had a word for the church—and this book is it. He has been warning about the increasingly disastrous effects of loneliness in our culture for years. That’s why this book is more than just a writing project. It is the result of hard-earned wisdom that only comes from living out the words that he writes here. In this book, Jake clearly and decisively exposes the silent epidemic of loneliness and points to a way forward that every church and ministry leader should attend to. It’s time to get back to spiritual friendship!”
Phil Wiseman
Lead Pastor of Table Church
“This book is a profound presentation of the reality and power of relationships and the relational God behind them. It will challenge you to not just do relationships but to actually be relational with the world around you. Dr. Thurston gives language to what every church and church small group strives for but far too many are missing. The Scriptures call it koinonia, but Dr. Thurston sums it up ever more clearly: you need friends.”
Phill Tague
Lead Pastor of Ransom Church
“Every so often, a book comes along that doesn’t just reinforce what you already know but gives you a framework to articulate and expand upon it. You Need Friends by Jake Thurston is one of those books. It’s a much-needed conversation about the loneliness epidemic, the ways we reject the very community we crave, and what true, spiritual friendship looks like.”
Dr. Christina Embree
President and Founder of Refocus Ministries
“We have all experienced it: Feeling lonely, feeling isolated. In fact, even in a crowded room, one can feel the pangs of loneliness. But our culture promotes ‘individualism' which counters our need for others and what the Bible tells us. Jake's book reminds us of the importance of Christians needing community. What I appreciate about this book is how pragmatic it is. It not only defines the 'problem' of loneliness, it presents biblical, practical remedies. Jake does a wonderful job informing us that we need community for support, accountability, encouragement and shared purpose in order to grow spiritually as well as serve others in ways God calls us to. I highly recommend this book!”
Dr. Jim Lo
Director of World Missions at Churches of God (Holiness) and Professor Emeritus at Indiana Wesleyan University